The SEND world according to me... Dan

Dad's Point Of View

That rare insight of being a dad to a child with complex additional needs. Look, is it easy? No. Did we expect to be here? No. But we are sure going to do the best of our ability for our full family.


The Forgotten Parent

(The Man Behind The Mum)

The forgotten parent, the guy who sit’s beside the mum - often nodding but taking it all in. When the doctor is explaining all of the in’s and out’s I am just there… taking it all in. Not for the drive home, but for later. When all the children are asleep, the day is winding down and me and Tracey finally get the chance to talk properly.

Being a dad is hard at the best of times because when people often think of parents they think of mum first. They don’t realise that behind the mum is a parent who is equal in the decision making, reacts just as quickly but we aren’t thought of that way. We are thought of as the back up. We are the people who are the sounding boards, the hold it together ones, and the level headed ones (in most cases).

The amount of times that me and Tracey have had differing opinions on subjects of our daughter, even though the end goal will amount to the same conclusion, a compromise has to be made to suit us both because 99% of the time dad’s like myself are often the one’s expected to go out to work and mum’s are left with the consequences of any decision that is made. BUT arguments don’t stop because you become SEND parents. They change, they become less about money and normal couple arguments and more about medical procedures, medications and school placements.

So I am here to share my views, as the other parent who is often thought of in the background but is ultimately the glue that sometimes holds mum together.